learning about sports

a young child assaulting a motionless object

this is the log of an interview i conducted with an acquaintance of mine he is a t-ball coach/referee and i realized upon learning that about him that i basically know shit about t-ball so in an attempt to enlighten myself as well as springwells readers i asked him a couple of questions about it:

mh: what initially attracted you to t-ball?

jb: oh, well the fun qualities of the game, i get to watch some pretty hilarious incidents on the ballfield and i get community service for it

mh: can you give an example of a specific hilarious instance?

jb: ok well, there was a time, a couple weeks ago, that a kid would not stop running around the bases, eventually passing the lead runner (which is a big no-no in this sport) and i literally had to pick him up and place him back on 1st bas to get him to stop running

mh: what do you find most frustrating?

jb: the kids have ultra-short attention spans, and this makes teaching difficult

I have to split my time between many activities to keep them engaged and am not able to focus on the key points as much as i would like

AND they constantly have to go to the restroom

it's insane

mh: are there any stereotypes about t-ball which you think are true (or false?)

jb: most are true

for example, many people think the kids are very out-of-touch with what goes on in the game

I will refer to a popular joke

a kid was running around the bases but when he rounded third he was confused because he heard his coach screaming "stay at third!!" and his mother screaming "Johnny you come home right this instant"

obviously the kid didnt get the difference between "home" as in his house and home as in the plate

mh: how important is t-ball to your self-image?

jb: well, I would say very important insofar as

1. it reinforces my image among my peers as a giving, caring individual

2. it is also crucial to my self-esteem because i am very competitive

and coaching a successful game makes me feel successful

and thats about it :0

mh: does t-ball play as big a role in your life as school? friends? god?

jb: definitely not, though that would be very funny

mh: thank you for your time

***

ironically i still don't know anything about t-ball....,

maybe i should have asked different questions